Monday, March 14, 2011
Angry Black Women...The Syndrome
I have just come to the realization that a lot of black women have anger issues and these issues run deep down inside of them and it compromises their character and who they should be. Being an angry black woman is not something that just happens, it is something that is imprinted and embedded within them. It is my belief that being an angry black woman is a plague, it is a disease and it is something that destroys a woman, therefore it should have a name, Angry Black Woman Syndrome (ABWS).
So where does this syndrome stem from? Is it something that a woman is born with? Is it something that is learned? Is it something they pick up from others? During this blog, I will attempt to explore and answer these questions as best I can.
It is my belief that for some people, this is a learned behavior, sort of like hatred. It is, in a way, a form of hatred that is inherited. Most black women are raised in a single parent household where they are constantly being told by their mother that black men are no good. Their mothers tell them that their fathers are no good, black men are no good, etc and this is where it begins. Because their mother experienced bad relationships, she embed in her child that she doesn't need a man, that men are no good and that child begins to believe them.
For some women, their fathers are the root of it all. Because they have absentee fathers, abusive fathers and so on, they think that all men are that way and their mentality is that by dating men of other races, they have upgraded. But the reality is, you are what you attract. Dating a white man, Asian man, etc will make no difference if it is something within you that attracts these types of men.
Another reason black women are angry is because they have angry friends. When you surround yourself with negative people who have nothing positive going on in their life, they will bring a good relationship into a negative one because they will always find fault in your relationship. They will hate on a good man because they don't want you happy because they aren't. Never surround yourself with negative friends and negative women because they will turn you into that same angry woman that they are.
Finally, some women attract bad relationships because that is what they want. They don't want that man who respects them wears fitted clothes, cares for them. The problem is they see that good man as only the friend type and tend to gravitate towards the thug type of man because in their mind he is what a strong man.
Now let be break it down for you...I came from a single parent household, however, my mother never talked negative about my father even though he was absent in my life. She never said black men were bad. She dated bad black men and good black men, but she still believed. I have dated all races and found that all men are the same regardless of color. It's not a race issue, it is a personality issue. I dated some bad black men because I was attracted to negative black men who were the thug, but now I have a good black man. He opens the door for me, he gives me his coat when it's cold. He respects me, he pays for our food. Don't get me wrong, he still has flaws but a good relationship is give and take. Sometimes you have to learn your place. It's okay to be strong, but don't be so strong that it is perceived as aggressiveness and cockiness. Don't accuse a man of cheating and definitely don't make him pay for all the bad men you've had in your life. Finally, do something to show that good man that you appreciate him. Stop making a man have to work for your love. Love is an emotion not a job and it is give and take.. So while you're out there being an Angry Black Woman, you're missing out on all the good black men, because no man should and wants to pay for another mans mistakes or the hatred you refuse to let go....So thanks to all the good black men that are a constant reminder to me that being an angry black woman really has nothing to do with the man, but more so the anger within the woman...so let go of the ANGRY BLACK WOMAN SYNDROME you have acquired, it's not wanted or needed to be happy!
So where does this syndrome stem from? Is it something that a woman is born with? Is it something that is learned? Is it something they pick up from others? During this blog, I will attempt to explore and answer these questions as best I can.
It is my belief that for some people, this is a learned behavior, sort of like hatred. It is, in a way, a form of hatred that is inherited. Most black women are raised in a single parent household where they are constantly being told by their mother that black men are no good. Their mothers tell them that their fathers are no good, black men are no good, etc and this is where it begins. Because their mother experienced bad relationships, she embed in her child that she doesn't need a man, that men are no good and that child begins to believe them.
For some women, their fathers are the root of it all. Because they have absentee fathers, abusive fathers and so on, they think that all men are that way and their mentality is that by dating men of other races, they have upgraded. But the reality is, you are what you attract. Dating a white man, Asian man, etc will make no difference if it is something within you that attracts these types of men.
Another reason black women are angry is because they have angry friends. When you surround yourself with negative people who have nothing positive going on in their life, they will bring a good relationship into a negative one because they will always find fault in your relationship. They will hate on a good man because they don't want you happy because they aren't. Never surround yourself with negative friends and negative women because they will turn you into that same angry woman that they are.
Finally, some women attract bad relationships because that is what they want. They don't want that man who respects them wears fitted clothes, cares for them. The problem is they see that good man as only the friend type and tend to gravitate towards the thug type of man because in their mind he is what a strong man.
Now let be break it down for you...I came from a single parent household, however, my mother never talked negative about my father even though he was absent in my life. She never said black men were bad. She dated bad black men and good black men, but she still believed. I have dated all races and found that all men are the same regardless of color. It's not a race issue, it is a personality issue. I dated some bad black men because I was attracted to negative black men who were the thug, but now I have a good black man. He opens the door for me, he gives me his coat when it's cold. He respects me, he pays for our food. Don't get me wrong, he still has flaws but a good relationship is give and take. Sometimes you have to learn your place. It's okay to be strong, but don't be so strong that it is perceived as aggressiveness and cockiness. Don't accuse a man of cheating and definitely don't make him pay for all the bad men you've had in your life. Finally, do something to show that good man that you appreciate him. Stop making a man have to work for your love. Love is an emotion not a job and it is give and take.. So while you're out there being an Angry Black Woman, you're missing out on all the good black men, because no man should and wants to pay for another mans mistakes or the hatred you refuse to let go....So thanks to all the good black men that are a constant reminder to me that being an angry black woman really has nothing to do with the man, but more so the anger within the woman...so let go of the ANGRY BLACK WOMAN SYNDROME you have acquired, it's not wanted or needed to be happy!
Friday, March 11, 2011
Sending troops to Lybia is a Bush move and we don't need this....
As I sat at this computer pondering what should be my next blog post, I can't help but notice all the controversy surrounding the fighting in Lybia. So I decided that it is my journalistic duty to speak on the issue....
We all remember the "weapons of mass destruction" mess with Bush and how we just had to go to Iraq and fight. We also remember how we began sending our troops over to Iraq to fight a war that was not ours to fight in the first place. What's the worst part of it all is that our government lied to us, they betrayed our trust and they allowed us to send troops to fight someone else's battle. Now, I'm all for defending my country and my people, but why is it that we always seem to be fighting other peoples battles, yet we can never get anyone to help us with our own battles. I'm not anti-government or anything but I do have a problem with my friends and family being sent to a country to fight a battle that the people of that country don't even want our help with. I mean, if we are going to go to a country to help someone fight, we should not be receiving opposition from those people that we claim want and need our help.
It just seems like we have this "hero mentality" where we have to be super-save-a-country or something. So excuse me if I am for not going to Lybia. Excuse me if I am for President Obama and the fact that he is not gunhoe about going to Lybia and fighting. It's so funny how contradictory we can be; we got mad at Bush for sending troops to Iraq; we got mad at Obama cause the troops ara still in Afghanastan and Iraq; yet we are mad the Obama isn't moving fast enough for us with Lybia. It's like we want to kill our economy or something. Is it just me or is this war expensive as heck already. I mean we are technically fighting two wars right now, even if you don't believe it or the government doesn't admit it. But just being honest, we can't afford to fight a third war. Heck we are having problems paying our own bills, gas prices are killing us and our economy is a hot mess so why do something we don't have to yet! I know one thing, if things keep esculating, we may be headed into WWIII!
So now that you have heard my thoughts, I would like to create some open dialogue to see what other's are thinking...no racist talk and lets be respectable of other's on my page...I will delete all offensive posts!
We all remember the "weapons of mass destruction" mess with Bush and how we just had to go to Iraq and fight. We also remember how we began sending our troops over to Iraq to fight a war that was not ours to fight in the first place. What's the worst part of it all is that our government lied to us, they betrayed our trust and they allowed us to send troops to fight someone else's battle. Now, I'm all for defending my country and my people, but why is it that we always seem to be fighting other peoples battles, yet we can never get anyone to help us with our own battles. I'm not anti-government or anything but I do have a problem with my friends and family being sent to a country to fight a battle that the people of that country don't even want our help with. I mean, if we are going to go to a country to help someone fight, we should not be receiving opposition from those people that we claim want and need our help.
It just seems like we have this "hero mentality" where we have to be super-save-a-country or something. So excuse me if I am for not going to Lybia. Excuse me if I am for President Obama and the fact that he is not gunhoe about going to Lybia and fighting. It's so funny how contradictory we can be; we got mad at Bush for sending troops to Iraq; we got mad at Obama cause the troops ara still in Afghanastan and Iraq; yet we are mad the Obama isn't moving fast enough for us with Lybia. It's like we want to kill our economy or something. Is it just me or is this war expensive as heck already. I mean we are technically fighting two wars right now, even if you don't believe it or the government doesn't admit it. But just being honest, we can't afford to fight a third war. Heck we are having problems paying our own bills, gas prices are killing us and our economy is a hot mess so why do something we don't have to yet! I know one thing, if things keep esculating, we may be headed into WWIII!
So now that you have heard my thoughts, I would like to create some open dialogue to see what other's are thinking...no racist talk and lets be respectable of other's on my page...I will delete all offensive posts!
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